Joy Lynn

 Jesus Follower.
Tom’s wife.
Silas and Ike’s mama.
Baker.
Plant killer.
Big sweatshirt wearer.
Strong opinions, loosely held.

Marriage Is Only The Beginning of First Kisses

Marriage Is Only The Beginning of First Kisses

When I Netflix binge-watch, I choose shows that I can have on in the background of whatever I'm doing without actually needing to watch every moment. The background noise is nice in an otherwise quiet house, and for the moments I need to derail my thoughts, it's nice to glance up and tune out for a few minutes. I've been through Grey's Anatomy, Gilmore Girls, and currently I'm breezing through Friends.

It's not a show I watched much when I was younger, but I get the draw behind the little love interests and deep friendship of the main characters. It's very superficial and not at all realistic, but that's TV... I get it.

The other day though, Monica came to the realization that once she married Chandler, there would be no more first kisses. No more of that beginning part of a relationship that has you clinging on their every word and action.
Yes, she later comes to realize that their more-than-skin-deep relationship is good too, but it really nagged at me.

Is that how some people really view marriage? The "end-all?"
No more first kisses *womp womp*
No more freedom and time that's your own *womp womp*
No more excitement or "firsts" *womp womp*
...and so on.

Here's the point that Monica missed:

It is up to married people to recognize, acknowledge, and cherish all the firsts to come.

Are we long past our very first kiss? Yes... and maybe some would mourn the prospect of never knowing that feeling again.

But I also remember...

  • our first conversation about getting married.
  • our wedding!
  • our first roadtrip.
  • the first nights in every place we've lived as a married couple.
  • our first big argument and learning the true power of forgiveness and faithfulness from that moment on.
  • our first kiss in our first house.
  • our first kiss every morning upon waking.
  • our first kiss upon arriving home from work.
  • our first time *ahem* you know what I mean.
  • our first big move.
  • our first career change.

God willing, we have plenty of other firsts to look forward to. Including...

  • our first major home renovation.
  • our first child.
  • kissing each new child for the first time.
  • kissing each child before they go to bed.
  • our children's first words, steps, day of school, S.O.'s, leaving the house, etc...
  • our first family dog.
  • our first grandchild.
  • our first time growing old together.

Life is filled with new firsts after marriage. Monica's mourning over "no more first kisses" made me so sad. Is that really appealing? Spending your life with first kiss after first kiss and missing out on all the firsts you can experience with someone throughout a lifetime?

I know I say it so often, but guys, marriage is such an incredible gift. You may not have that very first kiss ever again... but all the firsts after and to come, sound a whole lot more appealing to me. Don't find yourself tied to that beginning phase of a relationship because it's sweet and uncomplicated. Sure a first kiss is memorable. But more than remembering a bunch of first kisses, I'd like to remember a lifetime with the spouse God gave me. I've said it before, and I'll say it again. Let's be psyched about marriage, guys. It's so worth being psyched about.

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