Marriage vs. Marriage
"Comparison is the thief of joy" - Theodore Roosevelt
It's a quote we've all heard and we all need reminding of from time to time, don't you think? I've written about the topic of comparison before (read it here) in terms of life as a whole, but today I'm covering comparison of marriages.
I try to talk about the good, the bad, and the funny of marriage on this blog pretty equally. That being said, we live in an online world where it's so easy to fixate on the highlight reels of one another's lives.
We see the adorable pictures of various couples on social media and envy their photogenic selfies, adventurous vacations, new purchases, or exciting announcements of babies, moves, or job promotions. It can cause us to look upon our own relationship and feel less than. Sometimes the self-talk or internal struggle can sound like the following:
"They're so lucky they get to spend every waking second together while we work opposite schedules."
"Man, it must be so nice to jet off on a moment's notice to such beautiful places of the world."
"How do they afford so many date nights? And to be able to do so without kids in tow?"
"How does she look so dang good three days after giving birth? That'll never happen to me."
"Look at how he looks at her. My husband never looks at me like that anymore."
"How is it that their life plan has gone exactly the way they'd hoped?! Why is God's plan for our life so much different than we wanted?"
"Their life is so picture perfect! The house, kids, dates, trips... Man, they have it so good."
"How is it that they can get so much time off work?!"
"How does she have time to make such immaculate dinners for her family?"
"Where do they get all that time to work on personal projects?"
"How do they afford all the stuff for their house? I hate having to save and save."
Sound familiar? Gosh guys, I could go on forEVER on the topic of relationship comparisons we come across daily it seems.
But today I want to remind you, you don't know the trials of all those around you. Just as they don't know yours. Our comparison of one relationship versus our own is something sin concocts in our minds to make us feel unworthy, less than, and under-loved.
Maybe the couple you perceive as "picture perfect," looks at your life in the same way. This circle of comparison is unhealthy, unhelpful, and just ugly. Why do we do it? I say we, because I am guilty of envying particular persons quietly behind my screen too. I compare certain areas of my life to theirs and wish I could have those specific joys they experience. It causes me to begrudge my own circumstances and find unrest and ungratefulness in my very blessed, God-given life.
Now I'm not saying we should start turning our comparisons into, "But I bet his wife/her husband is really bad at _____. Or doesn't ______ like my spouse does." This sort of mindset is just as ugly, damaging, and sinful as the comparison itself. In fact, it amplifies comparison even more, don't you think? It justifies our own selfish need for self-assurance while at the same time tearing another relationship down... if even just in our own mind to "make us feel better."
That's no way to live.
And as Christians, it's not how Christ calls us to live.
"But godliness with contentment is great gain, for we brought nothing into the world, and we cannot take anything out of the world. But if we have food and clothing, with these we will be content." 1 Timothy 6:6-8
I chose this verse because I wanted to emphasize the importance of contentment. There are other verses on comparison (see my previous post on comparison), but I think at the very heart of comparison, we have somehow learned to dig a hole of discontent.
Let me explain what I mean by that last statement:
Think of the happiest day (with your S.O.) you've encountered. One that you simply look back on with great joy, contentment, and pleasure. Maybe it's your wedding day, a particular date night, your engagement, birth of a child, etc..
As you're thinking back on that day or that moment, do you feel discontent? It was your day. Your own special moment. Nothing compares to it because it was so unique to you, right?
Now compare your special moment/day with that of someone else. If it was your wedding day, compare it to someone else's lovely wedding, or something like that.
Do you feel a sad about your special day now?
Probably not, because your day was special to you. Others may look back on your day fondly, too, but they won't hold it in nearly the regard you do. There's simply nothing to compare with the personal elation that day or moment gave you - and that's why you thought of it in the first place. It was a moment of contentment in its purest form.
That's what I mean when I say we dig a new hole of discontent. It doesn't just appear, we let it - but you don't have to let it. Did my little exercise cause you to dig a hole of discontent in your happy moment? Well, I hope not (haha) ... but I believe the reason it didn't invoke discontent, is because you can so easily recognize that even though you are seemingly comparing the same thing, you're really not at all.
I challenge you.
Find contentment in your own. Realize that when it feels like there's so much to compare, it's your sinful mind working to dig an icky hole of discontent in your heart.
So what if your spouse doesn't cook and so-and-so's does? What does it matter to you?
Where is your personal elation in your day-to-day? Maybe your spouse gets up early to make you coffee. Maybe they do bath-time with the kids every night. Maybe they keep your gas tank full, or the laundry clean. Maybe they come home early and prioritize time with you. Maybe they work hard, long hours so they can provide a comfortable life for your family. Maybe they lead your family in prayer and devotion each day, or show selflessness to others that inspires.
Whatever it may be, find your contentment, dear friends. Remember why God brought you together and what trials you've faced and conquered. Think of the joys you've experienced that never even made it to your online 'highlight reel' and thank God for your spouse... for the friendship, love, faithfulness, and humility that marriage teaches us. There is no such thing as marriage vs. marriage comparisons, my friends, because each is so unique - thankfully so. Praise God from whom all blessings flow!
All my personal wedding photos are credited to James Saleska Photography
Fall Packing List
About four years ago, I would have happily joined the ranks of fashion blogging. Back then I had a closet filled with all things wild and crazy and I had no fear of fashion faux pas... often times to my everlasting shame (meaning: some really weirdddd outfits). However, nowadays I hold more to a capsule wardrobe - not because I necessarily want to, but because I don't tend to keep more than I need in terms of things. Minimalism is a way of life that seems to naturally suit me.
That being said, if I were to ever add fashion blogging to my little online space now, I think I would only do so in the fall.
Why?
Well because it's all things basic. It's boots, and textures, and scarves, and hats, and neutrals. It's a time of year when you can seemingly do so much, with so little. Not to mention, it's also the time of year when my little heart gets filled with happiness, and I leave summer's sweaty thoughts behind me and prance around in my pretty little boots and flowy dresses. Truly, I become an entirely different person.
Today, I'm sharing with you a few outfits I packed for the trip I'm currently on. All these pieces are great for mixing and matching and can be dressed up or down with more layers, different shoes, or added accessories. Keep an eye on my Instagram and maybe you'll catch me wearing them. I'll try to come back later on and link back to some of these items, but majority of them can be found at Old Navy and Target.
Would you all like to see more fashion related posts by season? Maybe a few posts on my versions of capsule wardrobes? Let me know in the comments!
Adult Friendships
So much of life is learning as you go. It constantly ebbs and flows upon peaks and valleys. Some of us will learn lessons that others never will, and we'll navigate hardships in many different ways. There is no telling what we'll encounter in this life, but one of the parts of humanity I cherish is how we can relate to one another. There is inevitable common ground among all of us, and finding that commonality can be discovered in a five minute conversation, or it could take years before we find that we can relate to certain individuals.
Growing up, finding that bit of commonality among classmates was easy. Whether it be on the grade school playground, high school extra-curriculars, or in college classes, creating friendships was fun and exciting. There was always plenty in common among so many peers, and often times lasting friendships were made. I think back to my own college experience and how incredible it was to have chosen my friends based on shared morals or values. For those four years, we were an inseparable crew, witnessing the next stages of one another’s lives in college, after graduation, through engagements and weddings… and now, babies!
Many, I think, are blessed in finding meaningful friendships during school years. Whether you have a shared faith or not, it’s easy to sift through a large group of peers and nurture friendships based on shared values. Those values can create enduring bonds which can lead to lasting relationships.
Eventually, of course, you’re out of this realm and on to the bigger, wider world. You see less of those friends you love, and you’re challenged to create new friendships among the new landscape of your life. The thing is, it’s so hard and different from the only reality you knew for the last seventeen years. Of all the things my parents, teachers, older friends, and siblings had taught or warned me about over the years, none of them mentioned how difficult adult friendships would be.
It just often strikes me as odd, though, that I had never even heard it mentioned. Especially since it has been an overwhelmingly common topic of conversation among my old and new friends in adulthood. We all seem to echo the same insecurities, so why in the world do we only know about this phenomenon upon entering post-grad life? How has this not trickled down to the soon-to-be grads in hopes they’ll remember to exercise friendship-gratefulness now?
But I hope to change that.
I hope this reaches the right circles and it can offer a well-meaning hint at life beyond classes and peers. Most college seniors have their eyes fixed on careers, new adventures, first apartments… and maybe even marriage - as they should!
But somewhere in that exciting time it would have been nice to have been warned that friendships later on would be so very, very hard. Not even just hard, but often times… weird. Awkward even. Suddenly, you feel as though you’re back in middle school, wondering if you said something dumb or if you’re reading into something more than you should.
Am I calling them too often?
Would they rather spend time with friends they know better?
Am I more of a nuisance to their schedule?
I wonder if they think I’m dull/uninteresting/whiney?
What’s the etiquette in _____ situation?
There’s no one way of defining what makes adult friendships difficult or awkward. Many times I think it has a lot to do with stage of life.
For example, in my first job out of college, I worked in a company with lots of young women my own age. We all got along great and the 9-to-5 was enjoyable together, but when I got married a few months after starting, a change started to occur. I started getting invited less often to happy hours or get-togethers outside of work, and on the flip-side, I would have rather spent the time with my husband anyway. I had a small sense of FOMO (fear of missing out), but mostly was more delighted to go home and be a newlywed. So, after a while, I became a loner and kept face-value friendships at the office, but worked for the weekends and nights with my husband. I still had my dearest friends from college within driving distance, and we tried to get dinners together every month or so. As my co-worker’s office friendships remained the same, mine grew more distant.
When we moved, I no longer had the buffer of family or close friends nearby, and the new idea that I had to make adult friends hit me like a ton of bricks. I worked from home, lived in a strange city, and suddenly adulthood seemed less enticing than it had only two years before. My husband was one of the youngest employees in his office, and meeting other couples with similar interests, in a similar stage of life, was rare.
I remember one night in particular that demonstrates the awkwardness well:
A few weeks after moving, we had discovered a small brewery nearby and made a date out of our first visit there. The brewery had a giant Jenga set, and soon we merited an invitation from another young couple to play against them. There were few other people at the brewery that night, and the four of us had a great time laughing between sips of beer and exchanging competitive remarks. After a couple of rounds, we said our goodbyes and left for the night. But shortly after pulling away, we commented on the chemistry between the four of us and wondered if asking for their number would be weird.
Did they have as much fun as us? Would they think it odd if we asked to hang out with them again, after only a couple hours worth of drinking and Jenga-ing? Should we really turn around and get their number.. or does that just look desperate? Is there even a way “ask out” another couple without sounding like creeps?
Needless to say, we kept on driving. We had never been in that scenario before, but it was the first scenario of many like it.
After several months, and upon further investigation (aka conversations with those I love and admire) I discovered that the awkward navigation of adult friendships isn’t an uncommon matter. Yet, the topic seems hush-hush or goes unspoken while we all silently struggle through. There’s nothing wrong with bearing it and learning our way as we go, but for some, knowing we’re not alone in our ‘feels’ can help us make sense of it.
It can help us relate, when later down the road, a ‘new adult’ comes along and mutters their secret struggle in making adult friends. We can look both ways before voicing loudly to them, “Welcome to the club! Let me buy you a drink!” We can hear them out, knowing full-well the struggles they’re facing. They can exhale a sigh of relief, knowing they aren’t some society reject, and can rest easy on the knowledge that fitting-in looks different as you age.
That it depends on shared values, or at least shared interests. That it doesn’t always mean being the same age, but maybe having similar lifestyles. That ‘clicking’ with someone doesn’t always happen right away (or at all). That desperation for a friend doesn’t usually bode well for anyone. That it’s okay to be choosy, but not okay not to give someone a chance. That friendship isn’t a one-size-fits-all. And that people may surprise you - in good ways and in bad.
There’s beauty in the struggle too, but sometimes having someone around to validate your feelings can be enough to help you turn your struggle into a new adventure. For a long time I felt no sense of validation, and I grappled for anyone to ask me how I was, just so I could finally pour my feelings out to any living thing that had ears. Sometimes, of course it fell upon deaf ears (the cashiers at Target, poor souls), but one day it fell on ears that responded with a ‘Hey, me too!” and new friendships were born.
If you’ve joined the Adult Friendships Are Hard Club, let me welcome you. Let me put a loving arm around your shoulder and validate you. You’re not alone, and your vibes on the matter are not just you. A lot of us get it. Just know, you’ll reach the other side. With prayer, a pinch of bravery, and an adventurous spirit, you’ll find your tribe. And inside jokes will live once more.
September | 2016
September has been so lovely. Even among the ups and downs, it has been truly wonderful. I turned 27 in the prettiest southern city, with the handsomest guy I know. My parents dropped in for a visit. We got our living room to a 'done' point. The medical tests I've been going through have given me some answers, and I am beyond grateful to have such an attentive doctor. The weather has begun to cool down, which puts me in great spirits. And so much more. September has always been a favorite month of mine. Not just because my birthday is in it, but fall weather seems to bring out a part of me that I miss during the summer. Here's this month's video recap (and I do not have fleas/lice.. I guess I just scratch my head a lot?!):
If you missed the August recap, you can see that video in all its awkward glory too. I'm having fun learning how to edit these videos, and I hope you're enjoying them! Let me know if you're curious about any other topics, and maybe I'll cover it in a post or video in the future.
blogs to explore
Candor and Rose - I found Lisa's blog on Instagram recently, and not only is it visually stunning, but her posts are so well written. She has a great mix of topics - check it out!
Coffee With Summer - Summer writes about blogging world etiquette, fashion, and life lessons. She's so relatable to me (and many others) and she's so worth checking out. Ever had a quarter-life-crisis? She wrote about that.
Simple Moments Stick - Susannah talks about everything! Being a mom, fashion, house hunting, you name it! Reading her blog is truly like getting to know her as a friend, and I love that she let's us in on it.
Punderdome
Finding games that can suit varying groups or personalities can be hard. Not everyone appreciates the speed or thought process of card games. Word games use yet another part of the brain that not everyone can find enjoyable. And still others find mindless games of "war" or "Candyland" to be a small taste of hell (haha).
Tom and I can personally become ultra competitive when card or board games emerge at a party, and not everyone can handle smack-talk or smug winners/losers. When we discovered this nature in our personalities, we started to seek out games where all players unite or where personal opinions are welcome. When I read about the background of Punderdome and how it actually originated with a father-daughter duo in New York, I got a little more intrigued. They created this game, and its been a live pun competition in Brooklyn for several years.
Having tested it out with my parents over the weekend, I can honestly say it will soon be a game-shelf favorite. Others have compared it to the vibe of Cards Against Humanity and I would fully agree. Points or prizes are awarded based on a prompter's preference (like in CAH) and it creates a less competitive, more enjoyable atmosphere. Even the really awful puns at least elicit some laughs for dorkyness! The conversations it creates are downright funny and have players morphing phrases or words into hilarious concoctions. Here's a little overview on how it's played:
"A player (the prompter for that round) draws two prompt cards from the deck, and then reads the prompts to the rest of the group, who have 90 seconds to create a single, groan-worthy pun that combines the two prompts.
When time is up, pun makers share their puns with the prompter, who awards the prompt cards to the player whose pun he or she likes best. The winner then draws the next pair of prompt cards and the process repeats. Players win by obtaining 10 pairs of cards"
Above is a really bad example, but it helps you get the drift. Create a pun that somehow involves The Beatles and Banking. Penny Lane and Can't Buy Me Love are pretty easy, obvious choices, but they demonstrate it well.
I'm so excited to own this little game and am truly looking forward to pulling it out for dinner parties and ice breakers in the future! If anything, you can always laugh about how terrible you all are at trying to think of puns! Follow this link to learn more and see a video by one of the creators.
For the sake of transparency with my readers, I will always tell you when I've received something for a discounted price (or free) or could potentially receive a commission off a purchase made through one of my links. Thank you for understanding the benefits these sponsorships bring to your favorite bloggers!
I received this game from Blogging for Books for this honest review.
If We Registered For Our Wedding Today
Do's and Don'ts
We've been married almost three and a half years now. Time has both flown and hardly moved, it seems.
In that time, we have moved twice - one of which was major.
From those moves, I've learned a few things about the stuff we own. When push came to shove, we tossed items instead of packing them and it's given me a few revelations about what was worth registering for, and what we could have bought ourselves... or not bought at all. I'll get right to it - here's what we learned.
DO register for...
Towels
Put them on your registry... BUT go neutral. Say your first apartment or house has purple accents in the bathroom. Well, chances are, your next place won't and your lavender towels will suddenly look weird and out of place. Going neutral (white, beige, gray, etc..) will help you keep those nice towels longer. The same can be said for kitchen hand towels, though they're inexpensive to replace if you tire of them after a year.
Hint: white towels can be bleached - easy upkeep! I hate thinking about what kinds of gross stains are hidden in dark towels.... and if benzoyl peroxide products come in contact with them, you're looking at pinkish bleach marks too :(
Knife set
You will use them. Whether you cook a lot or not, good knives will always come in handy. Just be sure and do a little research as some will get crummy over time. Reviews might tell you that not all knife handles are created equal. Whether they begin to rust, or somehow fall off, check those reviews.
Dinnerware, glassware, and silverware sets
Meaning: glasses, wine glasses, silverware set, dish set, bowls, coffee mugs, etc. This can depend on your particular needs (maybe you don't drink wine, so wine glasses are not useful). Go timeless if you're looking for items to last you possibly a lifetime. White dishes never go out of style, basic glasses, and classic silverware sets will always serve you well... literally.
Smaller appliances
If you love to bake, a nice KitchenAid mixer will last you forever. A toaster, clothing iron, coffee maker, good vacuum cleaner, crockpot, etc... again, there's no need for all the items you see, but knowing which ones you'd love to have starting out will be helpful. We've added a few to our shelves over the years, like a waffle iron, but early on that waffle iron would have been less valuable than a toaster. Which ones are the most basic to you? Go from there.
Tool set
Nothing fancy or huge, but a good starter tool set would have come in very handy several times even in apartment living. When I think back to the jerry-rigged things in our first apartment, I realize how much easier some simple tools would have made things.
Storage and organization
Two of the best underrated gifts we got were a large canvas tote, and large plastic bin (filled with kitchen utensils and other goodies). Everyone should wrap their wedding gifts in storage bins/organizers, because man, they've earned their keep over the last 3+ years. A good tupperware or glass food storage set, drawer organizers, etc... are used constantly and keep your stuff neat and tidy.
A good kitchen trash can
Maybe this is just us, but I do not know how people with tiny kitchen trash cans do it! Having a big can in the kitchen is priceless. The thing is, the nice ones are surprisingly expensive, so no one wants to dish out the money... but once you have it, you can't believe you waited all that time. We would have loved one as a wedding gift.
Pots and pans
This "do" list has a lot of kitchen stuff, I know. But truthfully, most kitchen items are used very frequently, so they make great gifts. We have a stainless steel set of pots and pans, which is great because you can scrub the bajeezus out of them and they won't get ruined. And their quality has been compared to All Clad. However, I think owning at least one really good non-stick pan is essential. The GreenPan is great because the non-stick won't contaminate your food as it wears out or gets scratched.
Basic bedding
I say basic, because again, a big colorful comforter may not work in your next place. White sheets (again) can be bleached so the upkeep is easy and it goes with everything. A good down or alternative comforter is a wonderful thing to own along with a duvet cover. We didn't register for any bedding or pillows, but now, I think it would have been a safe call and a really nice gift.
Gift cards
I know it seems impersonal, but if you have enough giftcards to the same place, you may be able to purchase the really big item that no one guest would buy alone. Or the less basic items that you 'want' more than 'need.' Those giftcards led to some more fun purchases that only we could have picked.
DON'T register for...
Home decor
If there is anything we've learned in three years, it's that styles change. Especially going from an apartment to a house, we've learned that many decor items that got us through temporary apartment living suddenly look terrible in a house. Personally, we did not register for decor and I'm so glad we didn't. This left more room for necessary items for everyday living... and those needs certainly don't go out of style!
Furniture
Do you know where you'll live in a year? Five years? That shelf you registered for may not fit in your next place, or you may just grow tired of it. The money spent on it could have been better served on a set of good platters or a great sauce pan. You don't want to limit where you want to live based on your gifted furniture. To this day, we don't buy expensive furniture because our life stage could mean more moves or messy children. We don't want to limit our living options based on our furniture or become devastated when someone smears peanut butter on the back of the couch.
Novelty kitchen gadgets
As hard as it is for me to put this one in (hello, we love our sous vide machine), it really is a don't for a wedding registry. A set of good knives will be far more useful than a rice cooker. Focus on needs first, fun stuff later.
Fun stuff
Okay, this one is debatable. Especially coming from a couple that loves experiences more than things. We almost registered for some camping gear (in fact, I think we did), but I'm glad we didn't get any because we've camped maybe twice thus far. I much prefer having those everyday items. When we did get a tent and some gear, we spent very little on them and they've been good for our short trips. Some people may love the fun stuff more, and that is A-Okay too... we just happened to discover that the necessities were really fun at that point in life.
What about you? What would you add or nix from a registry?
P.S. This is by no means an end-all-be-all. We're all different! After three and a half years, though, I'm still so grateful for all the wonderful gifts we received! Such a happy time :) It was interesting to write this post and see what a great impact kitchen items have on our life.
Some honorable mentions for the do list: cooking utensils of all kinds, measuring cups, cookie sheets, serving platters, large cutting board, wine and beer :)
Savannah, GA
If you caught my last post, I just turned twenty-seven. Since I'm not much for 'things,' Tom took me to Savannah, Georgia for a (way too fast) overnight getaway. Almost two years ago, we stopped in Savannah for no more than a couple of hours for lunch on our way to Hilton Head, SC, and we've been eager to return ever since. Needless to say, it did not disappoint. Savannah is incredibly charming, slow-moving, artistic, and historical. The food is wonderful and unique, and the streets are lined with old, looming trees, dripping in beautiful Spanish moss. I would highly suggest good walking shoes - wedges and heels won't go over so well on the stone and cobblestone streets of certain areas! And it really is a very walkable city, so shoe comfort goes a long way in the longevity of your day's adventures.
Since we were only there a Friday afternoon through Saturday afternoon, we mostly focused on exploring, catching the sites, and diving into the culture. I'll list off the places we visited (both pictured and not) just to give you an idea of Savannah life.
These first photos document Friday afternoon upon arrival. Some areas have updated parking where you pay at an electronic meter, but have a little loose change on hand, because some areas still use coin operated meters.
- Lunch at Gryphon Tea Room. This place not only had that elegant feel of a southern tea room set in a historical building with a delicate menu, but some of the employees were students at SCAD (Savannah College of Art and Design). If requested, they'll give you the interesting history of the building and decor, and explain the arrangement SCAD has with Gryphon.
- Next we moseyed around E. Shaver, Bookseller, kitty-corner to Gryphon, where we found the kind of books that you picture being in fictitious libraries. Like in the Beast's from Beauty and the Beast, or at Hogwarts. The familiar sorts of books along side the books that leave you wide-eyed and speechless.
- We continued to take a slow walk around the city squares, admiring the beautiful buildings and architecture, until we decided to head up to our lodging for the night. Side note: SCAD is a well known art school and the whole weekend we realized why Savannah made such a fitting backdrop for a school of that sort. The old, mixed with new, mixed with people, textures, and rich culture must be ideal for practicing the arts.
- We arrived at our Airbnb midday and promptly took a short power nap. Since we've become more avid in our use of Airbnb, we have started staying in shared spaces (versus an entire home). Here's the bedroom we rented in a house equidistant to Savannah and Tybee Island. It was a charming, clean home and those extra touches (like the complimentary bottle of wine) really make an Airbnb memorable and fun. Also memorable, is when one of the other guests walks in on you in the bathroom.. (haha it was a second after I had walked in, and was funny, not bad). Also, here's $35 off your first booking with Airbnb
- For the rest of the evening, we hit the beach on Tybee Island and talked while looking over the Atlantic and picking up a few shells. It was so relaxing, and the people watching was great. I mean come on, what else can beat the smell of the ocean and sand between your toes?
- We grabbed dinner at Tybee Island Social Club, and minus the fact that they seemed to be out of an awful lot of things, it was pretty good. Though, running out of Corona that close to the ocean is a pretty major faux pas in my book...
- After dinner, we dropped by a grocery store so I could pick out a birthday dessert because shockingly, all the bakeries on the island and in Savannah closed at 4 or 6 pm! We got back to the room around 8:30 and spent the rest of the night sipping our wine and listening to the conversations of the other guests through the paper thin walls (haha jokes jokes).
- Saturday morning was a little slow moving, but we had had one of those sleeps where you don't move once the whole night, so we were refreshed at least. However, we waited to get coffee at a coffee shop in Savannah, so it wasn't until 10am that we got to one (and there are many, thank goodness). My, were we a sight to behold. I am not exaggerating when I tell you we could hardly get a sentence out (take a look at my BRF as I wait for our coffee in the first pic). We made some friends while we all laughed at our obvious inability to function and we were so, soooo happy with our coffee shop choice. We chose Perc, because based on their reviews, they were a bit on the "coffee snob" or connoisseur side of things and we like that. They did not disappoint. We ordered a Chemex of their lighter roast (because, more caffeine) and for the first time in ages, drank an amazing cup of straight black coffee. Having lived in Milwaukee, surrounded by roasteries in every neighborhood, living in Atlanta's suburbs with nothing but Dunkin Donuts and Starbucks is really first-world-hard. We miss craft coffee. So we split a big Chemex, and promptly ordered up a couple lattes as well. And for the life of me, I forgot to take a photo of the incredible donuts they have brought in by a local baker called Asquad. And I mean incredible in the far reaches of the word. Like, out of this world, guys... so good. Sorry this paragraph was so wordy, but honestly, when it comes to coffee, we don't mess around - sorry not sorry.
- After we had been jolted awake (bless, you Perc, bless you), we hit the streets for some shop browsing and adventuring. Next door we found this incredible reclaimed wood warehouse that Joanna Gaines would just go crazy for, called Southern Pine Co.
- We also came upon Johnson Square, which lent itself to a few photo ops, of course.
- Let me also emphasize that the south is humid. Like, ghastly humid to the point of permanently sticky appendages, so take note of every long-ish haired person's living nightmare: HAIR STICKING TO NECK ... GAHHHHH!!! THE WORST
- We also took a stroll by the river, where there are plenty of touristy shops and art galleries. Though, I'm more interested in the history surrounding these riverside buildings, and watching the tug boats toot around. The Savannah Bee Company was worth a few taste tests (and air conditioning break).
- Back towards the middle of town, we visited my favorite store: The Paris Market. We had stopped there two years before, and their unique products and artisanal goods are so fun to look at. As you can see, the coffee had really kicked in and we were having a lot of fun there.
- For lunch, we went to Leopold's Ice Cream, which had been recommended to me, and was a clear local favorite. Somehow, we had beat the crowd and ordered both lunch and dessert with hardly a wait at all. Tom had chicken salad and I had a BLT (along with old fashioned fountain drinks), but really, the main event here is the ice cream. A sundae for Tom, and a scoop of Honey Almond Cream for me. Yeah, uhh, never pass up Leopold's if you go to Savannah.
- Down the block, we found a Blick Art Store and Tom was excited to find a piece of foamcore in his size. We thought we might do life-sized portraits of ourselves for the house. Eh? Eh?
- After a little rest at Forsyth Park while watching a rugby match, our trip came to a close. And also because my hair sticking to my neck was getting out of hand.
A huge thank you to my wonderful husband for treating me to such a great weekend and letting my restless spirit find a little peace. I think another trip to Savannah will make it onto our agenda again soon. There's just too much coffee we have yet to taste and more shops yet to explore!
Have you been to Savannah? What was your favorite part? Hoping to visit Savannah? Go!
twenty-seven
Dear friends,
It's hard to believe what my life looks like today, on this my twenty-seventh birthday.
It is not the vision I had in mind even two years ago, but it's better than I could have imagined. One reason being that I am about to enjoy the sight of Savannah's Spanish moss covered trees. My husband, the wonderful man that he is, knows that things don't have nearly the effect on my restless soul that experiences do. Every year he asks, "Do you want a thing or an experience?" and every year without fail I reply with all certainty, "An experience." The same thing happens at Christmas and at every other 'gifting' opportunity. So life as I know it is richly blessed. (Here is last year's birthday adventure)
Of course there are the pages in my life's story that I wish I could skim ahead to, and pages I wish I could skip past all together. Such is life and the fact is, I am not the writer. God is the author and perfecter of my faith... and of my story. He has a plan for where this life will lead, and though it is easier said than done, I trust in Him and in His plan. There are days when it's hard to see that plan at work, and days when it is so abundantly clear. But regardless of where my feelings are at on a given moment, I know that the faith He gives is rooted on solid ground.
I am thankful for where my twenty-seven years have taken me.
From Iowa, to Wisconsin, to Georgia, and all the visits and adventures in-between. From an insecure grade-school child, to a confident college graduate with an unbeatable spirit, to the young wife of a man twice her height and equal in sassiness. From a blond to a brunette. From a desk slave to a free-spirit. From a learner, to a better learner. From a talker to a listener. From an apartment dweller to a homeowner. From a pushover to a powerhouse.
Yet so much has remained the same. I am still a bad driver, heights and I don't bode well, mornings are still my enemy, and coffee my fuel. Cheesy breadsticks still make me salivate upon thought, and dogs still cause me to emit a gasp from the passenger seat that scares my husband half to death (though he's gotten good at seeing the dogs before me and preparing himself). I still love my routine, my long, dangly earrings, boots in fall and winter are still my favorite, and talking on the phone with my mom and sisters is still the highlight of each week. Of course, being married to the most wonderful, loving, thoughtful, and handsome husband is still my greatest pleasure.
Twenty-seven will bring with it more joy, excitement, hardship, and tears. More uncertainty, fierce love, hair dye, and lessons learned. It will challenge me to grow, push me to new heights, and remind me to be quick to forgive and to say sorry when I'm wrong. I refuse to let my humor, my outlook, and my personality age; they aren't synonymous with the years I've spent on earth.
Today, I rejoice. I thank God for another year and I ask His blessings on the next ones.
I'll raise my bottle of wine to the shores of the Atlantic and say, "cheers"... and I'll thank you, dear readers and friends, for joining with me each step of the way. You're in this too. Somehow wrapped up in my joys and messes and haphazard DIYs... and I'm grateful beyond words. You're the ones I share my cup of coffee with each morning. Though, you should know I am usually donning a large tee, messy bun, and giant glasses on our coffee dates - hope you don't mind. Thank you for sharing in my travels, marriage adventures, house renovations, and hard lessons learned. You're some of my favorite people and I know you'll be there through twenty-seven too.
Much love today and always,
the 27 year old
