France Travel Guide
Oh France. What can I say about you? I guess I should be straightforward and honest about our experience there, so, I'll just say it... France...
Oh France. What can I say about you?
I guess I should be straightforward and honest about our experience there, so, I'll just say it... France was not our thing. It had beautiful architecture, good food and wine, and stunning countrysides. But we are very light-hearted and playful and the French are not. They are serious and severe and we found the people (no offense to anyone) typically quite rude. Of course, we had a handful of great encounters with locals and our Airbnb hosts, but widely, we felt like an unwelcome nuisance.
I'm just being honest! I know lots of people have had perfectly pleasant vacations there, but coming from Iceland (where the locals are super nice) and then following it with Italy (where the locals are funny and jovial), caused us to judge the culture on a slightly skewed scale. We certainly didn't go in expecting to fit in or think they should cater to us - quite the contrary - we were very aware that we didn't fit their culture and were in a constant state of simply trying to not stand out. We were hyper aware of being respectful and apologetic when we made little faux-pas, and still they seemed to refuse to help us or teach us. Below I'll make note of some things we observed, but be aware, there weren't a lot of positives!
Things to note
- The currency of France is the Euro. Cards are widely accepted, but it was helpful to have cash for tolls or other such things.
- The language of France is French. I highly recommend learning several phrases, but I must admit, it was hard to learn, and understanding French is not easy.
- Gas is expensive. We drove from outside Paris to Dijon and up to Beauvais, and it added up.
- Speaking of Beauvais, their airport is horrendous. It's teeny tiny and flights were constantly delayed or we were moved terminals. We had to actually go through security twice because they moved us around so much for one flight.
- Sinks (like much of Europe) had a tendency to be very tiny. As I've never spent time outside the U.S. this was new to me. Bathrooms are marked with a "WC" which stands for Water Closet... and they really mean closet! Some toilets also didn't have seats like American toilets so you had to squat. Just FYI!
- Sidewalks are old and usually quite small. Just an observation - sometimes they're single-file. Very quaint, though!
- Extreme cigarette smoke and heavy perfume. We take fresh air for granted in the U.S. - haha - especially during early pregnancy (I wanted to barf everywhere we went in France and some parts of Italy).
Traffic
- Tolls are pretty pricey! Just be aware.
- Pretty easy to navigate coming from the U.S.
- If you take the tube in Paris, be prepared to get cozy with everyone - they are extremely crowded! Several times we actually had to wait for the next train because no one could fit.
- Do not even attempt to drive in Paris. We almost rented a car there to leave the city, but once we saw how people drove, quickly moved our car reservation outside the city.
Interactions
- No one smiles or laughs in public. So don't be surprised when you smile at someone and they dart their eyes the other way. I think it's viewed as flirtatious, but this was so hard for me to remember because "smiling's my favorite!"
- You constantly play chicken with people on the sidewalks. No one moves!
- Ignore the dogs and cute babies. They treat dogs like dogs there, so there is no petting or showing them any attention. Because of this, they have very well-behaved dogs, but it was killing me. Also, looking admiringly at little ones comes across creepy, so just don't.
- They are easy to offend and not very empathetic. I often couldn't finish my meals (thanks nausea) and would try to explain that I was sorry because I was pregnant (if they spoke English), but they usually just snubbed me and didn't respond.
- Never expect them to speak English. We always tried French first, but when we made it clear we spoke English, sometimes they'd just refuse to speak English to us, even if they knew how.
Food & Drinks
- Wine is not cheaper, or as cheap, as water. Why do people say that? Haha.. not true at all.
- You pay for water and you are always given the option of flat or sparkling.
- You don't have to tip.
- It's never very clear if you pay at the table or up at a counter, and if you get it wrong, they get annoyed with you. Just when we thought we had it figured out, we would end up wrong!
- If you order a coffee or food to-go, you have to actually GO. To-go or to-stay is taxed differently and we got scolded when Tom got something to-go, and then decided to sit down with me outside (and it was not busy).
- Also, eating while walking is considered odd. I would often get a piece of fruit (one of the few things I could stomach because #pregnant) and walk and eat it, and people would look at me like I was crazy. I finally looked it up and apparently the French culture just really believes in sitting down to enjoy food.
- Sounds cliche, but people carry baguettes around all the time! Haha we got such a kick out of this.
Where we stayed:
Paris: Hotel District Republique (small, but comfortable)
Dijon: Airbnb (this was our favorite in France - great hosts, very comfortable space)
Chalons-en-Champagne: Airbnb (meh, fine for an overnight)
Beauvais: Airbnb (not bad, not great - awkward layout)
What we saw:
Paris
Literally nothing. We were there for 24 hours and were so jet-lagged and nauseous that we ended up just sleeping! We walked around a bit and went to dinner at night, but honestly, I was so sick from the smells, that we missed out on everything. Sad, I know!
Dijon
I liked Dijon a lot. Old and historic, walkable, not crowded, good food, and very pretty sites. The French made us uncomfortable, so we didn't really go into any shops, but we enjoyed the historic cathedrals, market in the town center, and river-walk area.
Since French food wasn't sounding good, we found this cool little Argentinian place owned by a French guy who lived in Argentina for a couple years and fell in love with it. He spoke Spanish, which I can speak better, and the whole atmosphere was so much more laid back and welcoming. It was definitely a highlight and very tasty! You actually ate with your hands (which you just don't do in France and it was hilarious watching the locals trying to eat their empanadas haha)!
Chalons-en-Champagne
Incredible, massive cathedral near the city center. Very walkable and quaint. Here, we yet again went off the French cuisine and got sushi (with no raw fish for me, of course). We just took in the sights and relaxed and people watched.
Beauvais
Yet again, saw nothing. We were trapped in the airport with all our bags until we could check-in to our Airbnb in the afternoon. We had a few mishaps in planning on our part, so this was one of those wasted days, unfortunately.
French countryside
We drove through some backroads and took our time between towns, and honestly this was my favorite part of France. They had sunflower fields, and hidden Michelin starred restaurants, and pretty fields of grape vines. The little villages we popped into had much friendlier locals. We even overheard a group of older people speaking English and struck up conversation on the street (because thank goodness - ENGLISH!). They were from the U.K. and so incredibly funny and sweet! The French countryside is where it's AT!
Dear 2017
It seems to me, that a lot of people didn't like you, 2017. You know what I think? I think those people are just a bunch of Debbie-downers...
It seems to me, that a lot of people didn't like you, 2017. You know what I think? I think those people are just a bunch of Debbie-downers (or they just had a crummy year). There was crappy stuff that happened (just like every year). There was a lot of sad news (just like every year). There were opposing opinions and heated discussions and violent arguments... but guess what? It happens every year. That's just a fact of LIFE and living in a world of sin.
(So if you are looking for contentedness and grace, get to know Jesus, friends.)
Anyways, between you and me, I thought you were pretty great, 2017.
The Good
I spent yet another year with the love of my life. Tom and I laughed a ton, made-up a plethora of new inside jokes, cried together, walked through a long hard season while keeping our chins up, and loved each other infinitely more than the year before. We put all our trust and faith in Christ - never perfectly - but nonetheless, we muddled through and still managed to find happiness and joy amidst the difficulties. There is no other person I would rather do life with, and I'm so grateful for his love and our shared weirdness.
We brought home our dream pupper! You guys already know. Hondo is just the best dog in the whole world and we love him to pieces. He is unbelievably clingy and it seems like I can never escape a paw in my lap and a nose in my ear. He is everything we hoped for and more. We never tire of his hilarious antics (and if you want in on the fun, follow his popular Instagram). Read up on why he's so special to us in this post.
We took our first vacation in four years (and we went BIG). We saw three incredible countries and learned a lot about other cultures while meeting some amazing people.
We found out we are expecting a baby (and beat the odds of infertility)! What an overwhelmingly welcome surprise! In a future post, I think I'll share with you the details of our infertility journey. It was such a hard trial and unless you've faced it yourself, I don't know that you'd ever understand the raw hurt and pain that it comes with. However, I feel that being even a small voice for the massive amount of people that silently face this, is the least I can do. It has opened me up to a new sense of compassion and a greater perspective outside the simple excitement most people have when they start their families without a problem.
This baby, though, is so deeply loved already. Our gratefulness to our Lord and Savior for this blessing, knows no bounds. What joy and privilege we feel! I'd say this part of 2017 was a pretty major highlight :)
We moved out of Atlanta! I know I worded that in a way that might seem like a slap in the face to Atlanta, but... people get to feel how they feel, and we are so excited to be in Nashville. It's far less crowded, it's smaller to navigate, and it's closer to our Midwest family. We were a piece to the Georgia puzzle that didn't quite fit, and our latest move has been a welcome one. More on that later.
Tom got a new job. He was ready to be in a more fulfilling role, and this job offer came at some pretty wild timing (right after our big trip, during my first trimester of pregnancy, and the transition happened over Christmas).
We sold our first home. It was bittersweet to say goodbye to the house we DIYed and spent so much time making our own. We learned a lot about owning a home and the costs and work involved in it. It was a blast to have taken that on together and made such happy memories there. It will always hold a special place in our hearts. And I'll miss those giant base cabinet drawers, terribly!
We found a new house! God's timing sure is amazing. Sometimes it feels like you're in seasons where God constantly tells you "not right now" and other seasons where it's a clear "yes" or "no." Infertility was one long "not right now," but suddenly he started pouring a bunch of "yes" at us! This house was no exception. The housing market in Nashville is INSANE, but somehow we found an incredible house and got under contract on it the first week we moved here. The location, style, updates, everything... are exactly what we had been hoping for (and I cannot WAIT to share it with you!). We close in less than two weeks. Teeny spoiler alert photo below! We can't decide if it should be the office/guest room or the nursery...
Regrets
I just feel like I didn't eat enough queso.
Tough Stuff
The fog of infertility greatly affected my drive and left me feeling like I lacked an identity or had to keep such a major part of our life hush-hush (which always feels fake to me). I put up new content, but always wanted to talk about the reality of the hard things going on behind the scenes... yet, I never felt ready. Part of why I started working from home was to be accustomed to being at home once we had children, so when that didn't seem to pan out, it started to affect my overall purpose - online and elsewhere.
This new and recent season, however has greatly uplifted my spirits and excitement for the future. I cannot wait for the things to come, but I'm also greatly enjoying the present.
Oh and I got a kidney stone at 17 weeks pregnant and was in the hospital for two days. That kinda sucked. Haha..
So you know what, 2017... I'm grateful for you. I learned a lot, laughed a lot, cried a lot, and loved a lot. Not every year needs to be groundbreaking and incredible. Some years need to just carry you gracefully (or hectically in our case) into the next. Some years need to teach you how to grieve, and others need to teach you how to rejoice more enthusiastically than ever before.
Some years, however, are definitely a little more memorable than others, and 2017, you've made it to the memory books for sure.
First Trimester Recap
As you've probably heard by now, Tom and I are expecting our first baby in May! After two years of infertility and all the fun (sarcasm)...
As you've probably heard by now, Tom and I are expecting our first baby in May! After two years of infertility and all the fun (sarcasm) doctor's appointments and so on with that, we were somehow blessed with this little miracle. All babies are miracles, of course, but really... God is pretty darn awesome to have made this little baby possible. We have been singing His praises ever since, let me tell you!
Instead of doing the whole weekly bump-date thing that, (no offense) is a little overkill in my opinion, I'll just do them by trimester for those of you who might be curious about all things baby. I hope that didn't sound mean, but plenty of people have babies and each and every week isn't honestly that different from the next, or from each person. So I figured this would be more efficient. Anyways, here's what weeks 1 - 12 looked like. I'm going off my notes at this point, as I'm currently on week eighteen.
Symptoms
Nausea - everyday until after lunch! A few bouts of actual puking, but mostly just queasy all the time.
Tired - Oh was I tired. There truly is nothing like that early pregnancy exhaustion. I haven't been a napper for a few years, so it was really weird to suddenly start passing out all the time.
Sore boobies - Yup! So uncomfortable! As a tummy sleeper, this was sooo sad.
Dizzy - It may have been part of the sleepiness, but I would get crazy dizzy spells and need to sit down. Water intake was certainly helpful because it's so much easier to get dehydrated while pregnant too.
Food aversions - Europe was awful. Didn't want bread, pasta, coffee, pastries, etc.. so I basically lived off of yogurt, fruit, and crackers. Beyond Europe, meat and veggies were also not favorites.
Sensitive to smells - Europe, was again, terrible for this. Cigarette smoke makes me dry heave just thinking about it even now, perfume, farts (haha), dog food, leftover food in the fridge, etc...
Crampy - I have felt my uterus growing from the beginning. Maybe I'm just one that's more annoyingly in-tune with my body, but I always notice cramping (which feels like it's happening a lot). This has always alarmed me because they resemble period cramps sometimes. More water always helps!
Emotional - I'm not a big crier, but holy moly. Every slightly adorable/sweet/sad/whatever made me a sobbing mess. I had to switch to exclusively waterproof mascara early on.
Acne - womp! I had such annoying breakouts!
Vivid dreams - The weirdest, most vivid dreams! I'm not usually one to dream a lot or at least remember them, but I was having crazy dreams every single night. I actually loved this.
Cravings
I can't really say I had cravings in the first trimester, as much as I had moments when something FINALLY sounded good and we would take advantage. If I "craved" anything, it was always fruit. But really, I was so nauseous the first trimester, if a burger suddenly sounded good, we'd hop to it because it was usually short lived. Like a lot of women, I lost a few pounds in the first trimester because eating was hard. I ate a lot of grilled cheese, fruit, ice cream, granola, yogurt, cereal, cheese, and salad. Warm foods sounded far less appealing than cold.
First Trimester Journal
Weeks 5-8
We found out I was miraculously pregnant NINE days before our long awaited Iceland/Europe trip. The week we found out, I rushed in to the doctor for confirmation because this was so hard to believe. My bloodwork all came back normal and on par with gestational age, but to help support the pregnancy, my doctor did put me on oral progesterone. I'm super thankful she did, but it definitely heightens those pregnancy symptoms!
Also, to be transparent, we had actually planned this trip to get our minds off our infertility and take a break from doctors appointments.
SIDE NOTE: If you've never been through infertility, there are months where you honestly don't think about it much, and months where you do. You just take it a day, a week, a month at a time. It's always in the back of your mind, and many things can certainly trigger your thoughts and emotions, but you have to find distractions or you'll go crazy. Please do NOT comment below and tell me we got pregnant because "we relaxed" or "stopped thinking about it." We didn't think about it the first few months, and that didn't get us pregnant. We had an actual diagnosis and tests to prove there was clearly an issue, so please, spare me. Sorry, it's just another WRONG thing to say to people who go through this trial... I mean it in love and in hopes it helps outsiders understand.
Anyways, during our three week trip I was 6, 7, and 8 weeks pregnant. Basically the worst possible times to travel while pregnant and probably the most difficult (*see: tired, nauseous, and sensitive to smells). I. was. miserable. Grateful... but miserable. We saw nothing in Paris because it smelled so awful and I was so exhausted from our red eye. I had to take a nap break almost every day so I could function later, mornings had to be slow because of the morning sickness, and poor Tom had to be our legs and fetch me what few foods I could stomach. One of the times I puked on the trip, was in Northern Italy. I had opened our fridge to get some milk out for cereal, and caught a whiff of the leftover pizza. I had to RUN to the bathroom!
As a positive, though, I learned how to say "I'm pregnant" in Italian and it got me into a lot of restrooms without a hitch. Even in France, where we met a lot of rude people, once they figured out I was pregnant, they had a tendency to be more gracious and were suddenly willing to speak English..? The Italians were so cute when I'd spill the beans and were always super thrilled and happy. (I need to write about France and Italy, by the way!) Overall though, our trip had amazing "highs" and some yucky "lows" purely because that much travel at that particular time in pregnancy was not exactly enjoyable. Soooo many planes, trains, and cars!
Once we landed in the U.S. we stayed in a hotel with a luxurious king sized bed and slept (mostly) well (*see: jet lagged). I immediately felt better. So much so, most of my symptoms actually seemed to disappear and I felt a little worried. Thankfully, the day after we arrived home, we had our first ultrasound and baby was measuring right on track with a beautiful heartbeat! Shortly after that, I came down with an awful cold, and was down for the count for quite a while. But it was so good to be home!
Weeks 9-12
On week 10, I had my first OB appt. My blood pressure was high when I got there, and just fine when I was leaving. So they had me start checking at home. From checking at home, we narrowed it down to office nerves :) In that same OB appointment I got to hear the heart again. I thought it was just going to be blood work, so I had told Tom he didn’t need to come. He was bummed when he found out I heard the heartbeat - rookie mistake! They always listen to that heart!
During this time, Tom also accepted a job in Nashville (week 12) and we had to start the process of getting that moving. As it was early-mid November, it was looking like we’d be in house limbo during Christmas which was too bad, but we were so excited for these new adventures, it didn't rattle us. We had loved our visits to Nashville, and with a baby on the way, it was nice to be a few hours closer to family in the Midwest.
I stopped taking progesterone at the end of week 12. I remember being worried about this - as if it was my safety blanket - but my doctor assured me that the placenta would now have taken over! There was a little more cramping, but it soon evened out and I transitioned off of it just fine.
As many women have observed before me, the first trimester was not very fun! Things have been far better in the second trimester and I'm so glad for it. Those first weeks are mostly a game of figuring out how to manage your nausea and nap the day away while still continuing your life as normal. I dreaded Sunday mornings because I feared getting sick in church, and I felt so bad whenever Tom was eating something that stunk and I was gagging at him - haha!!
Of course, with the first trimester behind me, I'd gladly do it all again for the privilege to carry a life. We longed for, prayed for, and waited for this baby for seemingly ages, and we could not be more excited for him/her to arrive in May! Even on the hardest days of the last two years, God was good. He is good all the time - in the happy and the sad - but of course, we fail to see it in the sad, don't we?
Let me know if you'd like to hear more about pregnancy, infertility, or anything of the like. I'm not planning on going full-on "mom-blog," but as always, this space is a reflection of my life, so you can expect a few additions to that category!
These are a Few of Our Favorite (Amazon) Things
Tom and I are self-proclaimed "bad gifters." We're not very thoughtful when it comes to gifts, and mostly we hate feeling like we're just...
Tom and I are self-proclaimed "bad gifters." We're not very thoughtful when it comes to gifts, and mostly we hate feeling like we're just giving people more junk... which usually, we are, because we don't know what to get anyone.
So today, instead of coming up with a well thought-up "gift guide," I'm just going to show you a bunch of our favorite purchases on Amazon and maybe you'll find something listed here that might be nice for a family member, friend, or even yourself! Many of my favorite gifts, have been items that other people have given us that are tried and true in their own homes. We all have our "favorite things," but sometimes those have become your favorites, because they were someone else's. My favorite kitchen gadgets, for example, have often become my favorites because they were my mom's favorites first.
(All links are affiliate linked - see disclosure on the bottom of the page)
Joy's Favorites
Robe: I actually recently ordered this to wear in the hospital after baby comes. It's super soft and cozy, so I know it was the right choice.
Watch: I like cheap watches because I only wear them as accessories occasionally, and can easily switch up the style when I get tired of one. This is my current favorite!
Movie: A great Shakespeare classic with an insanely amazing cast.
Slippers: I'm a sucker for fuzzy, bootie slippers and these are my pick for this year!
Heat resistant case: Perfect for traveling when you use hot styling tools and then need to pack them right away.
Laptop sleeve: Light and basic, but protective.
Popsocket: Don't make fun of me... I love this stupid thing! Makes holding your phone so much easier. Especially when you have small hands in comparison to your device!
Camera organizer: A great, padded, structured organizer that you can move from one bag to another so easily.
Camera strap: It seems expensive for a camera strap, but it truly is the BEST. It's high quality and it adjusts lengths so quickly. I seriously think every person with a nice camera NEEDS this strap. Such a great product!
Tom's Favorites
Sunglasses: Tom is picky about his shades, and these ended up being just perfect!
Pens: I know it seems random, but since he does a lot of sketching for his work and note-taking, these pens are awesome. People always want to steal them from him, and for a while, we legitimately used to hoard them from one another haha! They're fine-tipped, and well, just trust me, they're worth what I'm cracking them up to be.
Watch: He used to wear a smart watch, but he got tired of charging it and just wanted something extremely basic for Europe. Now, he wears it every.single.day. It's super cheap, but it's thin, and looks nice. He gets comments on it all the time (which I think is so funny since he works in tech, and it's just a basic Casio).
Laptop backpack: I vouch for this. He used to accidentally leave stuff at home and would spend so much time rummaging through his backpack for stuff. But this bag is super structured, comfortable, high quality, and sleek. It has organizational places for everything. He loves this thing, and it genuinely keeps him super organized.
Down jacket: He ordered this for layering on our Europe trip and now wears it all the time at home. Lightweight but warm!
Hondo's Favorites
Well, these are our favorite things FOR Hondo I guess, but you can also check out our other favorites for him here: Products We Love for Our Large Dog.
Car Hammock: It just comes in very handy for protecting our seats and keeping him contained in the car. Heavy duty, too!
Hair removers: Tom's parents sent us one of these and they are AMAZING. Does what a lint roller does, but MUCH better and minus having to go through a thousand sticky sheets. These things are seriously magical and I recommend them to everyone!
Stretchy toy: Basically indestructible. He loves this toy and it also doesn't yank your arm from its socket if he tries to play tug-of-war with you!
There you have it! A few of our favorite (Amazon) things. What're some of yours?! I love how Amazon is a world of endless possibilities and ideas and cool gadgets, and I just love hearing what kinds of every day items other people can't live without.
Would you like to see another post like this in the future? Let me know in the comments!
The Story of Hondo
If you're new here, Hondo is the name of our Bernese Mountain Dog. He is a feisty one-year-old boy who brings constant joy (and lovable...
If you're new here, Hondo is the name of our Bernese Mountain Dog. He is a feisty one-year-old boy who brings constant joy (and lovable annoyance) to our lives. He was truly our dream dog, but we never thought we'd have him so soon in our life! This is the story of why we have Hondo now, and what he means to us. After the last two years, I feel like I have a lot to come clean about, and this is one of those things. Hondo has never been "just a dog" to us or "just the next step" for us. He has great meaning to our lives and he is loved more than words can say. Let me tell you his story...
Four years ago, Tom and I were newly married and happily living in the Milwaukee area. We'd go on lots of dates and fill our weekends with activities and adventures. One weekend, we happened upon the Air and Water Show on the shore of Lake Michigan in the downtown area. While we walked, I was (of course) pointing out any and all dogs because... well, you guys, they're dogs and I love them. If you know me, you know how annoying I am about my love for animals.
Anyways, there was one dog in particular that stopped us both in our tracks. Well, maybe just Tom because I marched over to it without missing a beat. I'm like a moth to the flame - haha! This dog was beautiful. Unlike any dog I'd ever seen in my life! It was huge and its features and build were incredibly striking. It was being "handled" by a grown man who was being pulled by the dog's massive weight and curious nature as it darted among people and smells. I approached the man, open-jawed, and asked what kind of dog this beautiful creature was and he replied, "A Bernese Mountain Dog" before being whisked away again.
From that day on, we knew we needed to know more about these dogs. We spent the next year reading everything about them and educating ourselves on owning one of these bears. The greatest con for me was the thought of their shedding, but I knew someday I'd be ready to tackle it for the sake of their gentle-giant nature and sweet temperaments. I am far too much of a dog-person to let shedding keep me from snuggles, but not everyone is this way.
At this time, however, we were still living in apartments, moving each year to a new place. So we vowed to get our Berner after a couple of children so they would be able to remember him (Berners have a heartbreaking seven year life expectancy).
However, as you may have read in my last post, our plan for having children did not go as we expected.
After a year of disappointment and heartbreak, and aching for a child of our own to love and hold, we started looking for Hondo. Well, first I got desperate and nearly came home with a guinea pig one day, but finally, Tom too decided it might be good for our hurting hearts to get our Berner.
For weeks I contacted all the most reputable breeders I could find in our radius. No puppies, failed breeding, etc... until one breeder responded that she had a litter due later in the week! After a few days of hoping, everything aligned and our contract was signed. We'd be getting the boy we always hoped for! (Shout out to our wonderful breeder, Trisha - now you'll REALLY know what Hondo means to us!)
Hondo is our infertility puppy.
He fell into our lap at the exact right time and we have been so blessed to call him ours. He is loved immensely, and filled a big part of the aching in our chests. He is the perfect companion and keeps me company all day long. He is always a step behind me, with his floofy tail going at full speed. I know he's "just a dog" to anyone else, but to us, he is a truly a gift. Think whatever you'd like, but I know God meant for this sweet boy to help carry us through the last year. He's brought unending laughter and hope to our every day life, and I am forever grateful for the happiness he brought to our home during such a sad time. His presence helped lift the fog of infertility.
At 92lbs, he doesn't seem so much like a baby anymore, but I'll never forget the joy we felt bringing that 12lb ball of fluff home with us. It was a tiny fulfillment of the desire to love another little being within the walls of the home we hoped would be filled with itty-bitty human feet. Instead, we had big, furry puppy paws that pattered around. It wasn't a baby, and we knew that of course, but my goodness did he (and continues to) bring us such great love and wonder at watching him grow.
Maybe this post seems silly to you, but to me, it was time to tell you the truth. Hondo is our bear-sized, heart-healing, boy. He has quite literally soaked up my tears after the announcements of more and more pregnancies that were not us. He got me out of the house on days when I felt like curling up and never leaving the safety of my bed. His silly antics, and never ending pursuit of our happiness, has brought such light to our home on even the crummiest of days. He'll never be "just a dog" to me, because he'll always be the little love that helped mend my broken heart.
And that is the story of Hondo. Our infertility therapy puppy, and love of our life.
A Letter To The Infertility Community
First, I want to say, this is a topic that is so near to my heart. Having been through this heart-wrenching trial, I have gained a perspective...
First, I want to say, this is a topic that is so near to my heart. Having been through this heart-wrenching trial, I have gained a perspective that many others have not. I am choosing to share this part of our life soon, but want to first speak with my friends I know - or perhaps I don't realize - are going through this right now. If this is a topic you think you know about, but have not experienced for yourself, I encourage you not to turn a blind eye, because I cannot tell you the shock I first experienced when I realized how many beautiful couples this affects. You know someone who is infertile. You may not ACTUALLY know they are infertile, but they are there, and they are hurting so deeply. God gave us peace in our struggle, and I hope my letter offers validation, hope, and love for those still in the midst.
Also, I realize this is not perhaps the most joyous way to announce my pregnancy on my blog (I’ve announced it on social media thus far), but truly, it is the way I feel most compelled to. Because I will never forget - and will perhaps revisit again - the raw emotion and foggy pain that infertility washed over us. I feel a great need to honor the beautiful, strong people I know who are facing this.
A Letter To My Infertility Community,
We’ve been trying to start our family for two years. It’s been a road filled with heartbreak, waiting (oh the pain in waiting), jealousy, devastation, hope and then hopelessness, sadness, and unmitigated aching.
Now, we are miraculously expecting. We are overjoyed and shocked, as any person who has struggled through infertility can imagine. For days, it was just plain disbelief. It happened to us! It’s the hope I know you cling to, that maybe it’ll happen to you too… by some miracle.
Yet you’re still there. Reading this. Waiting. Hoping. Feeling jealous, angry, and yet happy for us in some small way that we made it out of our suffering.
I want you to know, I think of you every day. The pain of infertility is fresh in my mind. Which is why I’m writing to you today. It’s why I’m writing this before I write a pregnancy announcement on my blog and plaster yet another thing where your hurting heart may see.
I see you. I validate you. And I know that you see our “two years" and perhaps scoff at our minuscule waiting period in comparison to yours or soooo many others. But try to remember. Remember how a few months in the very beginning felt like an eternity when you had no reason to think you’d struggle to conceive. How finding out your diagnosis (or lack thereof) was devastating whether it came at one year or five years into the journey. Remember that in no time at all, others began to “lap” you in their family planning endeavors and it hurt regardless of when it was in your struggle.
Know that even though we’re on the other side, I’ll always have one foot in the door of the infertility community. Cheering on those women who just want to be mommas. Who have miscarried over and over, and somehow find the strength to try again. To spend another fortune for just one more glimmer of a chance. Know that the silent sting of infertility and assumptive remarks of others have been burned into my heart, and I will promise to hold tight to the distinct perspective that comes with infertility. I will remember to check my sensitivity and always offer my ear and understanding to those going through this heart-wrenching battle so they never feel alone. Because oh how we know how lonely the infertility road can feel.
I need you to know that I pray for you. I’ve seen your moments of hope, drop to devastation in a matter of days, and it has broken me apart. Not as much as it has surely broken you, but it has nonetheless. I have cried with you, even if only on the other side of a screen. Infertility is torturous and unfair and dark. And yet, just knowing there is a listening ear when you’ve had to muddle through a day filled with pregnancy announcements and baby showers, is enough to refill your heart and remind you that someone understands. They know you’ll probably cry yourself to sleep (again) and begrudgingly drink a lot of wine, even though you’d give anything to not be allowed to consume it if it meant you’d have a baby soon in your arms.
I am a person of faith. I believe in Jesus Christ as my Savior and whether you do or not, He is my comfort and offers me the only true peace that cannot be found even in the arms of my husband. I pray that you find this peace as well. Whether in heartbreak or in joy, that you know there is peace that surpasses all understanding. That comes only from Christ and He is who I credit this miracle to.
Finally, thank you. Thank you for comfort, your prayers, your words of encouragement and understanding, your empathy while I vented, and for your unselfish joy when I shared our shocking news all those weeks ago. You were there that day, and knew before anyone else, and I’m so glad for it. You know the fear that comes with pregnancy after infertility - or can at least understand it - and yet, you were the first ones to say to me “You’re pregnant, girl, don’t doubt it - just enjoy!” Thank you for your loving “welcome” (does anyone really want to be welcomed to this?! haha) to the never-easy path of infertility. Your stories, vulnerability, and strength are beyond anything I’ve seen among humanity, and have given me a perspective I never thought I’d face, and yet in a way, I’m grateful to have learned compassion for those who face it.
I admire you all more than words can say, and I am privileged to know your journeys and continue to lift you up as you go, the way you did for me. I love you and I am here. Because infertility doesn’t just affect you and leave you once you have a baby. It’s with you always in some way or another, so I won’t be a stranger. In fact, we'll likely face it again.
Lastly, if you are reading this while experiencing infertility, and have no support or anyone to talk to, please don’t hesitate to message me. You are not at all alone (seriously, go to a fertility clinic waiting room and you’ll see!) and I want our story to be one of hope and compassion and respite for aching hearts. I am here. Infertility is lonely, but you don’t have to be alone. (Contact Me)
With all my love,
Joy
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October | 2017
Man you guys, I am getting so behind on my posting, I'm sorry! Our life has just gotten so insane (and I'll tell you why soon) but we're just...
Man you guys, I am getting so behind on my posting, I'm sorry! Our life has just gotten so insane (and I'll tell you why soon) but we're just trying to get our ducks in a row, and in the process I'm not taking many photos or creating much besides dinner and laundry. Is that very interesting to share about? NO. So as I say - my blog always reflects my life, and right now it is BUSY and not very "present" beyond what we're doing to try not to lose our heads. I hope that makes sense?
HOWEVER, I promise I actually have TONS to share, so I'll be filling you in once I can actually sit down and write about it. It's been killing me to keep all these bits and pieces to myself, but obviously, no one wants to share about things that might fall through or aren't completely certain and have to go back and be like, "sry, nvr mind" soooo that's why there's been such a hold up. GAHHH but it's killing me because it's been ALL consuming the past several weeks! Soon though, so be ready for some announcements.
Here's our unedited month of October!
So there you have it! A photo overview of our October. The only post I did this past month was my Iceland Travel Guide (see?! so behind!) but I'm hoping I can get started on my France and Italy guides too... as well as some posts going over the stories from our trip. I thought that would just be a fun change of pace and let you hear the good, bad, and funny of our three week adventure!
Is there anything else you want to see on Joy Lynn? Let me know! I seriously love your suggestions.
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Veggie Flatbread Pizza
Now I know I'm mostly the baking type, but today you are gonna be so #blessed to drool over this flatbread pizza that I made up. I got this...
Now I know I'm mostly the baking type, but today you are gonna be so #blessed to drool over this flatbread pizza that I made up. I got this idea after having dinner with a friend in the area and we split a veggie flatbread (which is very unlike me to get veggie anything) but our waiter totally sold us on it. He said it had bits of pumpkin and kale, and the flavor was really amazing... and even though he preferred meaty pizzas, this one had a special place in his heart. I guess we were feeling daring, so we agreed to give it a try. From then on, that flatbread branded a little spot in my heart too. So being a doting wife, I set out to recreate it for my husband one night before he got home from work.
There are seemingly many ingredients, but none of them cost much and you only need a little of each. I consider this flatbread to be healthy, but considering my meat-and-potatoes husband requests this, I feel like maybe I'm fooling myself. I'll let some health nut be the judge of its nutritious value.
Ingredients:
Store bought flatbread/naan - large
Fresh mozzarella - one ball, cubed
Olive oil
1/2 Sweet Potato - peeled, sliced in rounds, cooked, then cubed
1/2 Onion - chopped
Kale - several leaves, removed from stem, roughly chopped
Garlic - 1-2 cloves, chopped
Salt & Pepper to taste
Basil (dry or fresh)
OPTIONAL: 1/2 Avocado - small cubes
OPTIONAL: pistachios - handful, roughly chopped
Directions:
This looks really labor intensive, but I promise it's not.. just some chopping, but it goes fast because you only need a portion of each item. To save even more time, I use chopped garlic from a jar! This is seriously so flavorful and delicious. You could add or subtract anything you want. We've added sesame seeds in the past, which was good, and I sort of want to add bacon one of these times too (making it not-veggie haha). If you give this a try, let me know what you think!
Here are some glamour shots of the steps in order:
Preheat oven according to flatbread package instructions. Mine says 400.
Bring a small pot of water to a boil and let your sweet potato rounds cook. About 7-10 minutes.
While the potatoes are cooking, chop the onion, garlic, pistachios, and kale. Cube the mozzarella and avocado. When the potatoes are done (can easily be pierced through with a fork), strain the water and let them cool briefly. Then cube them. Set all aside.
On a cookie sheet (or whatever baking pan you have) place the flatbreads. Add the chopped garlic evenly over the top.
Add potatoes, onion, avocado, kale, and pistachios evenly across the flatbread.
Add mozzarella. The flatbread should look quite "full."
Drizzle a little olive oil, and sprinkle lightly with salt, pepper, and basil.
Bake according to package directions, about 15 minutes. Turn oven to broil for 1-5 minutes at the end.
Grab a glass of wine and enjoy!
